oh man

sooooo, i've literally started a second post 3 times now, so hopefully this is the one that will stick and i'll actually post it.

Here's a little from my past few journal entries:

So i came across this passage tonight. I've read it many many times, but it just seems so valid the more and more God breaks me (showing me that it's so true)....

"Come now, you who say, 'Today or tomorrow we will go into such and such a town and spend a year there and trade and make a profit'--yet you do not know what tomorrow will bring. What is your life? For you are a mist that vanishes. Instead you ought to say, 'If the Lord wills, we will life and do this or that.' As it is, you boast in your arrogance. All such boasting is evil. So whoever knows the right thing to do and fails to do it, for him it is sin." ~James 4:13-17~

This is so my life. I always try and make my own plans and i just know that God is up in heaven laughing and is like "haha you just wait...". God has just blessed me so much and really revealed His sovereignty. It's been so difficult but amazing....so amazing. It's so unbelievably freeing when you finally realize that you have absolutely no power in this world; that your life has nothing to do with you and is ALL about Him. This is a daily struggle for me...reminding myself that life isn't about me and to run after Him harder and harder. It's the most difficult thing i've ever done, but the most rewarding (and that's a huge understatement).
"Oh for grace to trust Him more."



Father, less of me, more of You.